My oldest child, Derick, is 13 years old. In true teenager fashion he’s ready to make choices I’m not ready for him to make. Namely, to live with me or his dad.
Honestly I don’t have any issues with Derick moving in with his dad. I think Derick needs a constant male role model considering he’s never really had that. Derick needs to bond with his 3 younger brothers. He needs to have this time to help him on his journey to becoming that person he will be forever. I would never want to hold him back from any of these things.
Except that his dad is 9 hours away.
Derick is currently at his dad’s for the summer as he’s been doing for the past few years. He hops on a plane or his dad comes to get him within a few days of school letting out and he stays there until a few days before school starts again. I miss entire summers with the kid. And it sucks.
My ex husband says that he and his family are moving to the Dallas/Fort Worth area, about 20 minutes from me, in September. And he says that he and Derick talked and that Derick is just going to stay with them, start school, move to my neck of the woods, and continue to live with his dad. This all sounds fine and dandy except that I know my ex husband and this will be around the 734Th time he’s said he was going to move here and then didn’t. He is notorious for telling people what they want to hear just to please them and doing whatever he wants. It’s completely infuriating.
Derick and I talked on the phone earlier this afternoon and he wanted to talk to me about him staying there and I just couldn't talk right then about it. I can’t handle any more stress and I know that my impending conversation with Derick will only add to everything. He’s supposed to call me back very soon and I’m a nervous wreck to talk to him. My tummy is doing flips and I expect even more when I talk to him.
I’m ready for him to come home, I miss my video game playing, leaves dishes on the kitchen counter, hogs the tv, teenager. I’m afraid that Jackson won’t remember him if he continues to be gone for so long. What if they don’t move back here soon? What if Derick never lives with me again?
Surely I’m being irrational and over freaked out, but it’s a real possibility. Hell, I haven’t even had a chance to do anything for Derick’s 13Th birthday that was almost a month ago. He’s been a teenager for a month and I haven’t even seen him. He could have sprouted a mustache (that he swore he had a year ago) or grew 9 more inches. I have no idea.
Do I sound desperate enough? I guess that’s what happens when you have kiddos. You act all bat shit crazy out of love and concern.
Whatever the outcome is I hope that I make the right choice for everyone. Especially my 13 year old.