2.11.2008

If I have the nerve or the chance...

I stole this from Jennie. I'm sure she doesn't mind.

Here are my unsaid things I'd love to say if I had the guts or opportunity to do so:

1.) I wish things could have been different. I wish I would have been more my more authentic self so you didn't now think I was a totally different person. I miss our carefree days when we were kids. I wish you would stop drinking so much and be nicer to people in general.

2.) I feel honored that we are friends. I wish we were closer.

3.) I often wonder if I would have been 100% me instead of what I thought you wanted me to be, if things would have turned out differently. Did you know I wasn't being my real self?

4.) Thank you for trying your hardest to be in my life. After all these years I am still adjusting. I only hope that I can trust you to stay in my life longer than a few years.

5.) Please take care of yourself. You are slowly killing yourself and it hurts me to watch. I am trying so hard to not be like you in that way. I love you, please do something before you die.

6.) You are a selfish brat. And you know it, don't you? I'd still do anything for you.

7.) You are worth so much more than what you are allowing yourself to have. I hope that you rid yourself of the parasite that's sucking the life out of you. I barely recognize you anymore, physically and emotionally.

8.) Our relationship confused me. It still does.

9.) I'm glad I didn't sleep with you when I had the chance. SO GLAD.

10.) I'm so sorry. I hope that I can forgive myself for what I did to you. I don't think about you nearly enough, but when I do I always hold back the tears.

8 comments:

Jess said...

These posts are so cryptic and I always try to figure out who they are all directed at. Yours was tough.

SLynnRo said...

I need to write me one of those. I can't help but want to know the story behind each comment.

Abbilicious said...

Oooooh I feel so nosey...er...curious. :)

She Likes Purple said...

I'm curious too! But these are great and I could say a couple of these to some people in my life, too.

Rebecca said...

Maybe the time will be right for you to one day share these thoughts...you never know.

Anonymous said...

oh, now i want to know more!!!

kristabella said...

You've totally piqued my interest!

I've thought about doing one of these posts, but since I have a big mouth, there is very little that I haven't said to most people.

Le Petit Chic said...

It must be so therapeutic to get those things out on paper. I really should give a try sometime.