Tonight I'm having my family over for dinner. I NEVER DO THIS. I never invite people over for dinner, or drinks, or watching a movie or ANYTHING. Why you ask? Why do I make sure that people never are invited over? Why do I go out of my way to avoid people coming over?
The stress! It's so stupid, too. I stress that my yard isn't cut to the proper length. I stress that my porch, if you can even call it that, is not swept properly. I stress that my house smells strange for some reason that I cannot smell but that it might offend others. I stress that if I offer someone a drink that I won't have exactly what they want or that a glass will have spots. If I make a meal I stress that they won't like it or that they will be allergic or, OH MY GOD. You get it, right?
It's so stupid, I know. If I invite you over it means that I like you and you probably like me equally and therefore you probably aren't going to white glove the baseboard behind my toilet, BUT WHAT IF YOU DO?! I don't remember the last time I cleaned any of my baseboards.
When I throw parties (rarely) I spend too much money getting napkins that match my party plates and buying 42 different beverages so everyone can have plenty of choices. I scrub the kitchen floor till I'm blue in the face and I vacuum the cats (kidding, although that's a great idea). When people do arrive at my house I want them to have a good time and so then I stress that I need to entertain them. I need to keep the conversation flowing and the laughs abundant. Music! Or maybe no music, television instead, or perhaps me juggling rings of fire would entertain? Visions of the perfect hostess enter my mind and then there's me. The stress of it all!
What's funny is that when I go to a friend's house I could care less if it's messy. I don't care if I have to move a week's worth of laundry to sit down. If you haven't done the dishes in 4 days I probably won't blink an eye. If all you have is water to offer me I'm happy to drink it.
So why on earth am I so hard on myself when it comes to people visiting? I just really don't know and I need to stop stressing over it all and just invite people over, already. Most people won't care that I don't sweep the floor often enough and they probably won't care if there's a few dishes in the sink.
From this day on I will make an effort to invite people over and not stress about it till I have no fingernails left. It's just not something I need to worry over anymore. I'm done with the self induced stress. Over it!
So, you wanna come over?
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10 comments:
I am exactly the same way! I have lived in my apartment for three years now and have not once invited anyone over! I'm not big on "just come over and hang out" but I want to be that way. But, I am also paranoid about smells and cleanliness. Especially since I have a dog and carpet! Ugh. I own every air freshener known to man and an air purifier. Or people might notice my lame attempt to decorate. I just remind myself if I had more money, I would have a nicer place...and my excuse for not inviting people over? I don't have a dining room table or a big enough TV!
Good! And a happy hostess is a good hostess, the end! Seriously, the best parties have a few unique details and a great vibe, nothing more. (And your house is fantastic!)
I was half-way through your post and I was going to ask you if you noticed any of these things when you visited - and you answered your own question. I can tell you are a natural hostess - so just relax and enjoy the company!
I feel your pain, dear! Before I married a slob who hates it when I clean, I used to clean my house every single day. (Well, the basic stuff...vacuuming, mopping, dusting, bathroom).
Now, I just go into a panicked flurry whenever someone is coming over. If you REALLY want to piss me off, show up without calling first.
I think that it shows respect to your guests to be sure that you're providing them with a clean, comfortable environment.
On the other hand, I don't discriminate against people in the slightest for not having a spotless house. However, if your abode is creating new strains of bacteria and unidentifiable life-forms are spawning in your sink, I probably won't come back, unless you're a really sweet and sexy male. ;)
I've been the same way for so long! But, lately...we've been having cookout after cookout and I'm starting to get better about just going with the flow. If I'm stressed, the company will be too.
Holy crap, you invited me over AND to stay at your house. You like me, you really like me!
:)
I'm exactly the same way. In fact, the electrician was just here, and I'm still mortified that I hadn't vacuumed first. You can imagine my panic when friends or family are over, then.
I never, ever notice this stuff at other people's houses, by the way, just mine.
By the way, I hear from TUWABVB that you may be in town this weekend for bloggy drinks? Hope so!
Do we come to see or your house? Yes, it's nice to visit a spotless house with everything looking like a magazine, BUT I would much rather visit YOU then your house. Besides, if your house was perfect then I would end up thinking like you and the circle wouldn't end! Love ya!
I love to entertain, but I have to admit that it stresses me out too! Jon hates it because I tend to go on a rampage about an hour before the guests are supposed to arrive. :)
I'm glad to hear that you are over it. I'll be glad to come over more often. I admit that I'm not the best person to commit to plans, but I love spontaneity. Even if it's to help you fold laundry if need be. :-)
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